I continue tidying up the bakery even after lunch break…
It’s a necessity to keep the places where you make food clean.
Up until last week, I start to bake the products before the lunch break, and so I could finish cleaning up during lunch break, but…
Currently, we start baking a second batch of pastries in the middle of lunch break…
I can’t finish cleaning up during lunch break.
Well, my work in the bakery is prioritized since I’m in the bread technician course.
Therefore, the teacher won’t get angry even if I arrive late in the fifth period.
Minaho-neesan talked to the teachers about it already.
Or so I thought…
「 Hey, what are you doing? 」
The classroom’s in the middle of a lesson…
I try to enter the back door stealthily but…
The teacher wearing a jersey standing on the podium glares at me.
「 Bastard!!! What time do you think is this?! Huh?! 」
Err, this teacher, if I recall…
It’s a teacher that came this September.
I saw him give his greetings during the opening ceremony for the term.
Geropa-kaichou and the teachers linked to Shirasaka Sousuke resigned out of fear before the summer vacation.
As expected, Shirasaka Sousuke’s last moments shocked them.
I think it’s six of them that retired.
Minaho-neesan managed to replace them during the summer vacation, but…
「 Hey, why are you not saying anything bastard?! Huh?!! 」
But this teacher is for the second year, right?
Why is he in my classroom?
He shouldn’t be in charge of the first years.
「 Oh, Sensei. You can’t do anything with Yoshida. He’s in the “Bakery course” after all 」
Tanaka explained before I could reply.
Oh, having a guy next to my seat who knows me saves me a lot.
「 Huh?! Now that you mention it, I heard that there’s that student. Huh?! you’re that job-seeking bastard. That guy who gets an OK anywhere! Huh? 」
Why is this guy always adding “Huh?” in all of his sentences?
No, putting that aside.
Why is this unfamiliar teacher in our classroom?
「 Oh, Yoshida, Nishiyama-sensei’s out for a holiday and so Narimoto-sensei’s our teacher for now 」
Tanaka tells me.
「 Huh?! That’s right, I’m Narimoto! Got complains?! Huh?! 」
She’s employed ordinary and decent teachers since four months ago,
She sighs on those who aren’t satisfactory enough among the teachers that are working since summer vacation, but…
「 Is there anything stuck on my face?! Huh?! 」
Why is a classic literature teacher wearing a blue jersey and sandals?
He’s got a towel on his neck and a tear-drop type sunglass covering his eyes.
Also, why does he have a bamboo sword on the one hand.
I don’t get it.
「 Then, what are you doing right now? 」
I ask Tanaka whisperingly.
We’re in classic literature class, yet…
All of my classmates have everything in their bag spread out in their tables.
Not just notebooks and textbooks, but also their lunch box and mobile phones.
「 Huh?! I, Narimoto, will be your bastard’s teacher in classical literature for today! Classic literature is about exposing your Japanese heart! With that said, I’m here to check all of your personal belongings today! Do you understand?! 」
「 Classical literature is about the writings from ancient times! And to feel the beautiful hearts of the people in the past, you must be clean in your body and mind, or this class won’t begin!! The mind’s filth means your possession’s filth! And with that said, it’s time to inspect your personal belongings! Huh?! 」
I don’t get it at all.
I mean, why do we have a lot of teachers who conduct this inspection?
I feel like this happened before.
「 Currently, I’ve already confirmed a third of the personal belongings 」
I look at Megu and Edie.
Both of them don’t have their items checked yet.
Megu’s looking perplexed.
Edie just has a fed-up smile.
「 I’ve already confiscated six manga volumes, three portable game device, four fashion magazines, and various cosmetics, accessories, small sorts, and etc. etc. They all have nothing to do with school!! And that’s why I’m confiscating them all! Got complains?! Huh?! I’m the G-man for personal belongings!! 」
Narimoto’s glaring at the students.
Oh, the students glaring back at the teacher were those who got their items confiscated.
「 And then!!! For all those whose baggage was swiftly checked, will continue to the second stage! Do you get it!? 」
「 Uhm, Sensei, isn’t that overkill that you’re checking even our phones? 」
One of the girls complained.
What? It’s not just item inspection.
This sunglass teacher is also checking our phones?
「 What do you mean?! Shut up!!! It’s the teacher’s job to check on your situation and know everything about you!!! That’s common sense! Papararirarapapa!! Huh?! 」
What the hell?
「 Don’t worry!! I don’t intend to check on all of your mails nor the details about it! All you have to do is show me all the images and videos you have saved in your photo!! Especially you!! Show me that!!!! 」
Narimoto points at the cute girls.
「 I’ll be looking at your gallery!!! 」
He’s a classical literature teacher, right?
「 No way!!! 」
The girl teacher points to shouts back.
「 That’s an invasion of privacy! No way!! 」
「 Don’t fuck with me!!! If I cannot break through privacy laws, then why do you think I became a teacher?!! 」
Why would you become a teacher for that?
「 Ever since I got my teacher’s license, I’ve been trying to apply to become a teacher in high school for seven years and six months, all of it while trying to work part-time on fast food chains!! You don’t understand that! You bastards! Ungrateful bastards! Rueeee!!!! 」
The “Huh” turned to “Rueee.”
「 You see, it’s been my dream to become a teacher and stand in front of high school girls!!! I thought of giving up on that so many times. Especially when they raised the part-time worker’s hourly pay by fifty! Kuuuuuh!!! You see, when I applied in prep-school or cramming schools, they rejected because “I’ve got a bad expression in my eyes,” not once, not twice, but it was twenty times. All of my interviews had the recruiting agency tell me, “Our company can’t hire someone like you!” 」
You hired this guy?
This is bad.
If they were to check my phone…
He’d see Misuzu and Ruriko’s photos.
No, I didn’t put in any risky images on my phone, but…
To be honest, I don’t want this old man to see it.
「 Darling, you should get your phone inspected first 」
Edie told me.
「 Huh, why? 」
「 Sensei, this guy has some stuff he shouldn’t have brought in school!! You should check on him first!!! 」
Edie pointed at me and said.
「 Huh?! Really?! Bastard?! Is that exchange student correct?! Huh?! 」
「 Right. Exchange students don’t lie~ 」
No, Edie, you’re not an exchange student, right?
Edie’s smiling as she does that.
She must be thinking of something…
「 Who cares! Bastard, open your bag and show us everything that you have!!! This is an inspection!!! Give it up!! Huh?! 」
Somehow, he now speaks like police this time.
I head to my seat…
I open my bag and show him what I have.
「 There’s nothing strange in there 」
I’m coming to school as an average guy.
I don’t bring any manga nor cosmetics.
「 Hmmmmm?! What’s with this book?! 」
Narimoto pokes his bamboo sword on the book I took out from my bag.
「 Oh, it’s a book on how to make bread 」
「 Ooooh?! What’s this book?! 」
「 That’s for the cost accounting on my bakery 」
「 Then, then, what’s with this book?! 」
「 Oh, that book is about the laws and business lessons for my bakery 」
「 Why the hell is it all related to bakery!!! 」
「 Well, I’m taking the “bread technician course” after all 」
Then, opening the pockets of my bag…
A size C battery comes out.
「 What’s this battery?! Bastard, where do you use this battery? For merrymaking?! No, I’m sure it is!! Put that down, and I’ll confiscate it!! Formulary of Adjudications!!! 」
「 That’s wrong! 」
I grabbed the battery and made a fist while looking fed up.
「 I just use it to grab and make a fist 」
「 Why the hell are you making a fist?! 」
「 It’s to increase the power of the punch 」
Or so I learned from Michi.
I mean, Michi also has some of these.
「 What do you mean?! Not Bread(Pan) but Punch!? 」
What’s so strange about that?
「 Isn’t that obvious? 」
「 Devil chop punch power! That kind of punch? 」
「 No, if you’re talking about chop, then shouldn’t it be chop power? 」
「 Then, “Fly! Rocket Punch!” That kind of punch? 」
「 Oh, yes. That kind of punch 」
I nod to Narimoto.
Huh, why is everyone silent now?
「 You see, you grab and turn your hand to a fist, and when you punch someone, it has higher destructive power 」
「 Y-You’re punching?! Bastard?! 」
「 No, not that I’ve done it though 」
「 I do 」
「 And that’s why I also have my battery 」
Then, she shows the battery she holds in her hand.
「 This thing won’t be questioned by the police. It’s not a weapon, after all. If this were a knuckle, or a knife, or a club, then they’d start asking questions 」
Yeah, that’s right.
「 W-What’s with you bastards?! 」
Narimoto’s trembling for some reason.
「 Sensei, don’t worry about it, it’s just a battery 」
「 Oh, oh. Right. Yeah, you’re right. It’s just a battery. You did that on purpose to frighten me, don’t you?! No, you don’t have to say it. That’s how it is. Let’s leave it at that. I thought my heart would explode. Huh?! 」
What a troublesome old man.
And as for the remainder in my bag…
「 Hmmmmm?! H-Hey, what is that? 」
「 It’s my beat-up stick, what about it? 」
I always carry that around.
It’s a golf-club cut short.
「 B-B-B-B-Beat up revolution?! 」
「 Beat up stick 」
Huh? I feel like this happened before?
Deja vu? 1
「 Uhm, I’d like to ask for future reference, but why do you have that? 」
「 It’s a beat-up stick. Obviously, I use it to beat up people 」
Can’t you guess from the name?
Are you an idiot?
「 See, it’s like this 」
I swing my beat-up stick…
It made the sound of cutting the air.
I sometimes train together with Michi and Edie.
I’ve gotten used to this.
I swing it around a few times.
「 Oh, and that, you, hit…someone with that stick?! How often? 」
「 No way, it won’t bend that much from hitting people 」
Does he really have no imagination?
「 But, why does it look like your stick is bent down a little? 」
「 Oh, that’s because it curved when I hit someone with this 」
「 You hit someone? 」
「 Yes 」
「 A person 」
「 Yes 」
I slammed Kudou-papa’s head with this one time.
I can still the swinging feeling I had.
「 But that was last May. I slammed him for being so stupid. Recently, nobody is showing up worthy of it 」
「 I-I see…. 」
Narimoto takes distance from us.
「 But, that beat saber 」
「 Beat up stick 」
「 Yeah, that beat up stick…You bring that to school every day? 」
「 Obviously. But you don’t know when you need to hit someone with this. Thus, I need to have arms at all times 」
「 Do that happen around you? 」
「 No, you don’t know when or where the enemy appears 」
They’re unknown after all.
「 Ah, naturally, if the enemy has a pistol or anything that I can’t use this beat-up stick to deal with them, then I’ll just run away. If I show that I have a weapon, then it might provoke them, and it’ll get troublesome. Right, Edie? 」
「 Right~! 」
「 Just for example, an enemy could come and attack this room through that door! 」
Edie throws her shuriken.
The shuriken sticks to the bulletin board at the side of the classroom’s door.
「 I’m always on standby to make sure I can deal with them anytime 」
「 What’s that? 」
「 There’s still more! I’ve got this!! 」
Edie lines up her shuriken on the table.
「 That many?! 」
Narimoto’s stepping back to the entrance of the classroom.
「 Huh?! Tell me. Where did those obedient children go? Those who let their teacher sexually harass them?? Are there no lovely students left?! 」
「 They’re gone since long ago!! 」
Edie throws her Shuriken on Narimoto’s step.
「 Hiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!! 」
「 Well then, I’ll be taking my leave!! Stay healthyrurururururu!!! 」
He then escapes from the room.
So, what was it in the end?
「 ！！！！！！ 」
The whole classroom started laughing.
「 Huh? 」
Why are they all holding their sides while laughing?
「 H-Hey! Yoshida, you…!!! 」
Tanaka talked to me while laughing.
「 Since when did you start studying to become a comedian instead? 」
「 Besides, you still have that “beat up stick” prop 」
「 Oh, it’s still funny even for the second time 」
They think that it was a joke?
Well, this is the second time.
The second time that the inspection showed this beat-up stick.
「 Geez, who would’ve thought that Yoshida-kun is this funny. That’s a surprise 」
「 Yamamine-chan must be attracted to that side of Yoshida-kun 」
The girls say.
「 You know, that part where he took the battery and said: “it increases the power of the punch” while making a straight face made it hard to hold back 」
「 Then, Edie-chan even had a battery on hand! God save us from dying from laughing 」
Well, this is okay.
If they think that it was a joke, it should be okay.
「 U-Uhm, everyone, since the teacher’s gone, let’s use the time for self-study instead, okay? 」
Megu tells everyone as the class rep.
「 Yes~ 」
Our classmates replied.
Is this okay?
「 It’s okay 」
This is okay.
◇ ◇ ◇
The sixth period is over.
Our class adviser, Minaho-neesan, is replaced by another teacher.
It’s an old teacher with white hair.
He’s been in this school for nearly 20 years.
Minaho-neesan entrusts Megu, Edie, this class, and me to a teacher she knows from before.
As expected, she won’t entrust us to a teacher she hired last summer vacation.
「 Hey, Yoshida 」
One of our classmates come to me.
「 Just to be clear, I’m not the one asking this but a senior in our club 」
Could this be?
「 Uhm, is Katsuko-san single? 」
「 Sorry. I don’t know about that 」
I should answer that way.
Nei and everyone told me.
「 Why do you not know? 」
「 Nono, Yoshida and Katsuko-san are teacher and student, they won’t have that kind of conversation, right? 」
The other boys said.
「 Wait, you don’t? I mean, you two are always in the bakery together, though? 」
「 But, Yoshida and Katsuko-san make that massive amount of pastries all the time. I don’t think they have time to have some idle talk 」
If I don’t give a definite answer, they’ll just create their own.
「 Well, I guess. Katsuko-san won’t be talking to Yoshida about that 」
「 And that’s why instead of asking Yoshida, we should go to Yamamine-chan instead. I think that Katsuko-san would speak to a younger girl more than a guy 」
「 I don’t know anything 」
Megu comes over.
「 Yoshi-kun, I still have my club activities today 」
「 Yeah 」
Megu smiled at me, and then the boys…
「 Don’t say that Yamaine-chan, you should ask Katsuko-san! If I don’t get an answer, my senior will scold me 」
「 No way. If you want to know then go ask Katsuko-oneesan 」
「 If I could do that then I’ve done that long ago 」
「 Right 」
The guys lose their strength.
「 Then, how about asking Nei? 」
「 Eeeeh? Natou-senpai? 」
「 That one’s too beautiful, it’s hard to talk to her 」
「 Really? Sorry for not being beautiful then! 」
Megu tells the guys.
「 No, well, Yamamine-chan… 」
「 You belong to Yoshida already 」
「 I’m not an object. I am myself 」
「 By the way, why is nobody asking me? 」
「 Well, Edie-chan 」
「 Yeah. I don’t think I could trust any information coming from Edie-chan 」
「 Oh? If you ask sincerely I’d reply though 」
Edie said while puffing her cheeks.
「 R-Really? 」
「 So, do you know anything about Katsuko-san, Edie-chan? 」
The guys took the bait.
「 However, I’ll reply in English 」
Then, she uses her New Orleans accent…
She said something…
「 Huh, what? 」
「 What did you just say, Edie-chan? 」
「 Who knows? 」
I get the gist of what Edie said.
“Katsuko already belongs to Darling.”
I think that’s what she said.
「 Ignorance is bliss. And that’s all from me! 」
Edie continues to laugh.
- now sing it in the lyrics ↩