“I-I thought I invited you to come to my chamber last night!” fake Ariel corners a noble and says with a cute pout that is intended to be seductive.
“Ah… yes… of course!” The noble responds nervously. “But then… well, my wife wouldn’t let me leave!”
“She… uh… well, I found out she was pregnant… and lately she looks like she did ten years ago. Plus, she’s been ravenous lately. So, naturally, I was inclined to give my wife some much needed attention.”
“You… well… how about tonight?” fake Ariel demands.
“Well. To be honest, my wife…” The noble shrugs. “Sorry! It’s not you, it’s me. I appreciate the offer, but things are going pretty well with my wife and I right now.”
The noble takes off in a half run before the fake Ariel could chase after him. She crosses her arms under her chest and makes an annoyed tsk.
“Hey baby, if you’re that hungry, I got something here for you!” A nearby guard says quite lewdly while grabbing his crotch.
This guard is actually fairly new, and after seeing all the shenanigans the nobles got up to, he had formed some fantasies of his own. Seeing the desperate Ariel had emboldened him to act. He could have been considered quite lucky. Had he acted this way around most nobles, he’d have been just as likely to be hanged as fucked.
“To think, I have to resort to the help to get some!” fake Ariel pouts. “Very well, let us go!”
“Yeah?” The guy immediately grows very excited, realizing that he had the chance to fuck a princess.
The guys at the adventurer’s guild he used to work would never believe this. He decided that he would keep her soiled panties as a reward. This guy’s luck is simply too good. She grabs him and starts to push him into a room. He immediately starts working on taking off his belt. This is shaping up to be the greatest day of his life.
His face suddenly stops as his stomach groans loudly. His legs tighten and he gives the fake Ariel a pitiful look.
“What is it?” The fake Ariel demands, clearly trying to get him to continue to remove his clothing.
“I… uh… gotta go!” The man immediately shoves passed the surprised Ariel and runs out of the room.
He b-lined for the closest bathroom while holding his ass. His stomach is still making noise like a dying whale. His once in a lifetime chance with a princess is destroyed by a sudden onslaught of explosive diarrhea. Fake Ariel only waits for a few minutes before snorting and walking away, still looking aggravated and unfulfilled.
“Are you listening to me, owner!”
“Hah?” You finally pull back from your totally not spying on people magic. “You’re talking?
“Owner… I was telling you all the things I’ve been doing. I have information on all of the future gladiators for this next round as well as their weaknesses. I discovered six plots, two which were aimed at Riun, which I stopped through clever espionage. I even helped get that stupid sex toy proper permissions to be in the mansion after she almost caused a national incident! Why you’d use it to do your spy work instead of me is beyond me. On that note, I found the identity of this fake. You won’t believe this… it’s actually-“
“Cinderella, yes, I know.”
“It’s a name that starts with C. Known by Grimhilde. She is vengeful towards humans, I mean, she is a vengeful spirit, and having been raped and murdered by nobles, she’d naturally be against them. She has no distinct appearance as a ghost, but would naturally have the sex drive that the fake Ariel exudes.”
“…” Rapunzel was completely speechless.
“Yes, I know it’s Cruella.”
“Oh, thank Pun!” Rapunzel lets out a breath of relief. “I really thought for a second you were going to send this story in that direction.”
“You and a lot of people, but no, the obvious person is obvious.” you explain. “I mean, it wasn’t even like it was a secret, really. If I made this NTR-like stuff suspenseful or kept the plot meaningful I’d only have people having a fit like they are with Gaia’s story. Bunch of freaking babies.”
“What was that, owner?”
“Oh, nothing. On that note, why are you telling me all this stuff and looking at me like that?”
“Ah? Owner, haven’t I done good?”
“If by good you mean conveniently closing up plot holes and providing blatant exposition, then I suppose you’ve done your purpose…” You respond wryly.
“Then… owner… perhaps… Could you give this squirrel an award?”
“Eh? A squirrel award? You mean, like some nuts?”
Rapunzel looks down at your crotch. “Well… in manner of speaking.”
“Alright, let’s do this!” You give her a thumbs up.
“Yes!” Rapunzel looks at you excitedly.